2024 is upon us and New Years is a term synonymous with ‘resolutions’. I think it’s great to encourage self-reflection, thinking both about your achievements and setting intentions for moving forward into a brand new year.
However, it is definitely important to remain critical during the social media ‘resolution’ storm currently raging on. Seeing lists of other peoples ‘achievements’ – you know the things – we’re talking engagements, holidays, babies, career milestones and all the rest of it – has the potential to make you feel pretty shitty / like you haven’t achieved ‘enough’. This doesn’t mean to say people shouldn’t share these things and be proud of them, they absolutely have the right to do that and shout from the rooftops if they want to! BUT, Instagram being a highlight reel, the achievements in the mundanity of every day life (especially motherhood) are often overlooked.
You make it through every day, often running on empty, but prioritise your children’s wellbeing above all else. You’re juggling kids, paid work, unpaid work, relationships, constant illness, mental health issues, and all the other general shit life seems to throw at us periodically whilst still trying to do the bare minimum to take care of yourself – sleep, wash, eat, move your body. To me, that’s a pretty fucking drastic achievement when you do it 365 days in a row.
After the overindulgence of the Christmas party season (for me it’s at LEAST a month where I have a “fuck it, it’s Christmas” mindset) I find it refreshing to have a fresh start, January always feels like a bit of a clean slate and that’s a great opportunity for lots of people to add in habits that will improve well-being. OBVIOUSLY I have an issue with women being constantly targeted with ‘get fit’ adverts generally steeped in body-shaming, but of course I support women wanting to make a positive change for themselves. For me, exercise is so incredibly rewarding for my mental health, so doing it consistently without the calorie counting is what works for me. When the emphasis is on weight loss or purely aesthetics, there is a risk it becomes SHAME or GUILT that is driving the behaviour change and this is so damaging for our mental health, and the bottom line is it just won’t work.
I also think it’s really important to remember to context of WHERE we are in January – ie, in the depths of winter darkness, when we are in hibernation mode, with the least daylight hours, freezing cold and pouring with rain – these don’t tend to be motivating factors for getting outside and moving more! I think it’s much more sensible to set intentions such as going to bed earlier, drinking more water, eat more nourishing food, meditate for 10 minutes a day; than try and commit to an “overhaul” of behaviour like joining a gym and trying to go 4-5 times a week. For most people it just won’t work because it’s too much, there’s too many factors stacked up against you but you’ll feel like YOU’RE the problem, that YOU’RE just not motivated or disciplined enough, and that good old shame spiral starts again. NOT helpful for anyone, least of all you!
The truth is, you WILL fall off the bandwagon TIME and TIME AGAIN. It’s REALLY hard when you’ve done it over and over, you tell yourself “I always fail” and any endeavour to incorporate healthy habits and fitness become shrouded in negativity and past ‘failures’. The key is to keep getting back on the bandwagon, and recognise health is a lifelong pursuit. It won’t happen overnight, it doesn’t have to – start small and build on it, make yourself accountable and ASK for help from your family, because you’ll certainly need it.
If you need somewhere to start on a journey to feeling stronger, reach out to me, I can help! But you should give yourself absolute unapologetic permission to not set a SINGLE resolution this year, hunker down and focus on making it through one long winter day at a time.